Typhoid and Amebiasis

Two of the worst things to have in Mexico, i have. At the same time. Fuck.

Cultural Purgatory

Growing up I have always been considered Mexican. Though I am Mexican by race, culturally, nothing could be farther from the truth. I'm the product of an American culture. Yes, I have Mexican cultural tendencies, but the truth remains, I am an American. Though, I prefer Chicagoan. At age 14 my parents decided that it was in my best interest for the family to move to the suburbs. During my first week of school my classmates were kind enough to educate me about racist terms I had never heard before. That was when I first became conscious of my cultural purgatory. More problems arose once I became one of the few Mexican kids in my school who listened to punk. I was no longer acting Mexican, according to my Mexican friends, now I was acting "white." The white kids called me Mexican and the Mexicans called me white. Identity crisis? Luckily, I never really felt alone in my cultural purgatory. On more than one occasion, my uncle, an immigrant who is now a US citizen, has always said something to the extent of "the Spanish that we know, we are forgetting. While the English that we're learning, we can barely speak."The Mexican Immigrant who returns home, no longer feels completely at home, and from what I have seen, is at times treated as a tourist. This mostly applies to the Mexican-immigrant that has established a life in the United States, the immigrant that has been gone for a considerable amount of time. Regardless, there's still an interest in the Mexican-immigrant to retain and nurture this "long-distance nationalism." I love having conversations with Mexicans about their "Mexican brothers" once removed: the Mexican-Immigrant, and their "Mexican cousins:" the Chicanos. The Mexicans perception of the returning Mexican-Immigrant is one filled with curiousity and a sense of detachment. Mexican-immigrants are sometimes seen as exaggerated versions of Mexican culture, caricatures of their cultural identity: big belt buckles, rare leather boots, big trucks, etc. El Mexicanismo that was once natural, second nature, has now become deliberate. A sort of "we will live in your country out of necessity, but not like you." A conscious, defining, defiant act. This seems like a very natural response considering the risk posed to the culture by living in a foreign country. Growing up a Chicano my parents have made no illusions about me being an American, they too are very aware of this fact. Yet, it hasn't discouraged them from instilling a certain level of pride or an awareness of our cultural past. They are my direct link to a world that very much has the potential to be lost. My grandfather is Mexican, my father a Mexican-Immigrant, and I'm an American. Each one of us worlds away from the other. It's amazing to meet Mexicans and observe them trying to figure me out. I'm brown, tattooed and obviously from a city, but Mexican or American? I'm fluent in English, yet fluent in Spanish. And not only fluent in the languages, but in their idioms as well. There's something in the way that I speak Spanish that doesn't quite make sense, I don't have a Chicano accent, an American accent. I have a rural accent. I inherited that from my parents. Instead of saying "para usted?" (for you?) I'll say, "pa' usted." Think the equivalent of "y'all," a slight Mexican drawl. A lot Mexicans I've met are perplexed by this, but I feel like it makes perfect sense. I'm somewhere in the middle.

Patrick Oster- Mexicans: A personal portrait of a people.
Mariano Azuela- The Underdogs: A Novel of the Mexican Revolution

Pulque (Octli)

I drank Pulque over the weekend and it was awesome. I've always wanted to try Pulque and learning that it was used in religious ceremonies by the Aztecs only added to the allure of it. Pulque is made by fermenting the juice of the agave plant, known as aguamiel. Though mezcal, tequila and pulque are all made from the agave plant, they are each made through different processes. Mezcal and tequila utilize the heart of the agave plant, while pulque only the aguamiel. Making pulque is a very organic, raw, simple process, with rarely any pasteurization involved. It's has a white, chalky color and the consistency of smoothie that's been sitting out for a while. Pulque isn't really distributed in mass quantities, though there are a few companies that sell it canned, as it's still mostly considered to be a "rural mexico" type of drink. Some people I was drinking w/ kept joking that you get drunk from pulque not only because you drink it, but because it keeps fermenting in your stomach. I don't know how much truth there is in that, but I could definitely see why people would think that. Pulque is a very, very raw drink, you're literally drinking agave nectar, and it tastes exactly what you would imagine an agave to taste like. Bland. I guess you could say it's an accuired taste. Halfway through drinking my first pulque I started feeling a bit light-headed, spacey. I'm not saying that I had any visions of Centzon-Totochtin and Ometochtli, the Aztec gods of drunkeness, but I did have a bit of trouble following my train of thought. Maybe it's because we had been drinking a bit before that, but I like to think that it was because of the pulque. Since learning of Pulque I've been interested in trying it, partly because of the rawness of it all, but mostly because my grandfathers, great-grandfathers and every descendant before them had consumed it. The PBR of the olde days. I'd like to know more about my ancestors, and being in Mexico definitely increases my opportunity to do just that. I've been reading a bit about the history of the town that my dad's from in an attempt to learn more about the indigenous people of the region, and have learned that archeologists are starting to speculate that El Cerro de Culiacan, an inactive volcano that sits at the foot of town and is known as Teoculhuacan Chicomoztoc to the Aztecs, was possibly the cradle of pre-hispanic Mexico. This means that the Toltecs, Mexicas, Aztecs and Purepechas would've all descended from there. I've known about my direct ties to the Purepechas of Michoacan, my maternal great-great-grandmother was Purepecha, but I've been mostly in the dark about my paternal indigenous roots. There's been speculations of the Guachichiles, Otomi or Chichimecas, all who lived around the region of La Canada de Caracheo, but I'm yet to find any concrete evidence or a direct link. Regardless, the search continues.

The Inevitable

I've been in Mexico for a little over a month now, and I continue to feel like I've taken a very necessary step in the right direction. Has it been an easy step? No. Especially when everything seems to go out of its way to remind me that I am not from here. As if I'm not already aware. The food. The water. The people. What will come of it? I have no idea. Yet, I still find it very necessary. Mostly because I've had the opportunity to talk w/ many people about Latin America, globalization, humanity, immigration, Mexicans, Americans, Mexican-Americans. Specifically about what effects they feel any of these topics has had, regardless if they're negative or positive, on their life. I've been fortunate enough to meet people that have made me question what I believe, and others who have brought up points that I might have overlooked. How great would it be, if overall, we could live in society that was not only critical, but capable of admiting fault? Of boldly changing situations and systems for better ones. A society that accepts progressive ideals when they first become available, and not after blood has been shed or war waged. I guess we're all just afraid of change. MLK was assasinated on April 5th, 1968. The 40th anniversary was 5 days ago. Civil rights is considered as something very undeniable in this moment in time, but a mere 40 years ago it was considered unthinkable. Worst of all, unacceptable. The same goes w/ feminism, gay rights, environmentalism, etc. The fact that conservatives in the American government continue to be afraid of socialist revolutions in Latin American countries and in the world over, only serves to validate that disparities in wealth do exist and should be changed. Progress has been made. We're slowly, but surely, moving towards a more just society. A society where the majority of a population won't have to risk their lives in order to eat. A world where people can enjoy the type of life that we in the United States take so much for granted. The simple things. Food. Clean water. Education. The ability to immerse myself in a different culture, in order to learn more about my past and my future. Does this mean that society should remain idly by, because progress is "inevitable?" No. Even though ALL of these changes have been caused by a rather small minority of humans who have taken it upon themselves to be part of progressive movements, at the risk of their well being, society as a whole, needs to become aware and take these effects into their own life. So as to not burden a minority that is striving for change, because of a majority that literally begs it, needs it. I hope I will learn how to live my life in accordance w/ what I see and feel. Whatever that may be.

Mezcal (from Nahuatl -mexcalli, liquor)

I didn't go blind. As anticipated.

San Miguel de Allende

On September 16, 1810, Miguel Hidalgo of the nearby city of Dolores, lead his his rebel army into the city of San Miguel. San Miguel, under the leadership of Ignacio Allende, helped rally against Spanish rule. The town was officially renamed San Miguel de Allende in 1826, in recognition of Ignacio Allende's contribution to the Mexican struggle for independence from Spain. The city of San Miguel is an amazingly beautiful town w/ a population of about 138,000, that displays it Spanish influence proudly in it's colonial style homes, large terrace windows, open air patios, ornate doorways, cobble stone roads and Spanish style churches. As in most Mexican towns, the tallest structure is the church steeple, making for amazing sunsets visible from any west facing street. The state of Guanajuato is considered to be the cradle of the Mexican revolution, w/ it's inception being in the neighboring town of Dolores Hidalgo. I was initially planning on staying in San Miguel for only about a week, but since learning of the areas historical meaning, I now plan on staying a bit longer and visiting neighboring Dolores Hidalgo. My intention is to learn as much as possible about my parents native country. I find it a tragedy that so much history and culture has the potential to be lost in one generation.

Book:
The Conquest of New Spain- Bernal Diaz